Blues to Luiz doo doo David to Barca ?

With The Daily Mail reporting that Barcelona are ready to tempt Chelsea’s David Luiz to the Camp Nou with a £35m offer, We analyse his first season at Chelsea.

Luiz, the 24 year old Brazilian with hair Cleo Laine would be proud of, has put in more doo doo zoppity bop performances this season than Cleo has when filling gaps between lyrics down the years. Though Luiz pedigree cannot be questioned, his desire to play off the shoulder of Drogba for 90 minutes does leave the coaching staff and fans at Chelsea feeling like they were duped when Luiz was peddled as a central defender.  Luiz has been likened to 1950’s comedy  “The Galloping Major” where a syndicate is set up to buy a flat racehorse but  quickly discover they’ve been sold a dud, good enough only for jump racing.

In some quarters that would be seen as a harsh assessment and Luiz can hardly be classed as a dud just yet, though a good starting point to improving his reputation in the English game would be to play the position he was bought to play ! Perhaps a length of bungee rope tied round the goalpost and attached to the back of his shorts would go some way to curtailing his tendency to cross the halfway , although you would hope a simple instruction from his coach would be sufficient for a £100k a week footballer to toe the line and not forget his defensive responsibilities.

That said, Barca, and moreover Pep Guardiola, evidently sees something in the style of Luiz that would fit into the Barcelona school of exemplary football, maybe it’s the laconic pace of play, the more technical nature of the Spanish game. Whatever it is, Guardiola has made few mistakes in integrating new players into Barca’s style and the world now recognises that in their midst is the best football side ever to play the game.

Maybe after one season in the Premier League and with the biggest and best club side in the world knocking at your door,  Luiz doesn’t feel he has to prove his critics in England wrong, and maybe he would prefer to ply his trade in a league renowned for allowing players to express themselves.

If Luiz does leave in the summer, you are unlikely to witness scenes on the streets around Stamford Bridge reminiscent of those in North Korea on the news of Kim Jong Il’s death. Most Chelsea fans wouldn’t  give a skadoolia do be dee doo bop.

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